"It is a very sad thing to be proud of making others miserable."
- Me

Monday, November 15, 2010

I think Claudia is dying.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM http://ping.fm/fJWhq

HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM

HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM

1. Go to a secondhand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots.

2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo Magazine.

3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.

4. Leave a note on your door that reads:

"Bubba,

Bertha, Duke, Slim, & I went for more ammo and beer. Be back soon. Don't mess
with the pit bulls; they attacked the mailman this morning and chewed him up bad.

I don't think Killer took part, but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house.

Better wait outside. Be right back.

Cooter